Can't...fight...early...adopter...syndrome...

I'm trying, I swear.

Really, I am. I even wrote a post about how unimpressed I was with the second generation iPhone on AT&T's 3G network. Look, it's not my fault, okay? I've been diagnosed with early adopter syndrome.

I was doing just fine, you see, until my friend dropped his stupid phone into the ocean. When it became clear he'd need a replacement, he asked me if I knew when the next iPhone release was going to be. And that's when I relapsed.

See, the thing is, it doesn't even matter to me that I could care less about 90% of the new applications on the phone. Nor am I really affected by the advent of the 3G network, because I spend most of my time in a free wireless cloud anyway. But none of that matters.

I have to have it. Oh yes, I will be in Union Square on July 11, I can guarantee you that much. I'm not asking for your sympathy. Just please understand that it's hard for me to say "no."

And if you really want to know the truth, the hardest part was when Sansserif casually asked me when I was going to get the new phone, as if it were a matter of course that I'd eventually buy it. I mean, when you put it like that--it just seems so obvious. I have to accept who I am.

Unfortunately, it is by its very nature a contagious condition. Don't worry. I will keep myself in isolation while I play with my new smart phone. If you need to reach me, you know my number. Or just send me an email, or post a comment to this blog for that matter because I'll be checking on the connection speeds pretty regularly. Just please remember that it's hands free in California after July 1, so if I'm driving you may just want to text me and I'll ping you back.

So if the first step to recovery really is admitting that you have a problem, then let me proclaim far and wide: My name is Youareyou. And I am an early adopter.